How to Deliver a Difficult Message Without Demotivating Someone

I haven’t met many leaders who actually like conflict and look forward to delivering a difficult message. However, dealing with conflict and delivering hard feedback is an important part of being a great leader and it is possible to do without demotivating the recipient. Use this “beginning to end” framework to plan and prepare for the next difficult conversation you need to have.

Know your motivations.

Make sure you are clear about why you are giving the feedback and how it’s helpful to the other person. 

Think carefully about your invitation.

What is the best time and place for the conversation?

Make sure you have all the facts before you talk with the person.

A bit of research can make a big difference.

Plan out the flow of your conversation.

Here is an article I wrote that might help.

Encourage and recognize progress.

Once you’ve had the difficult conversation, be sure to encourage the person and recognize when they make progress.

Follow through

And lastly, be sure to follow through on any commitments you made to help and support them. This builds trust and shows you care.

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